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I like my men like I like my wine. Screw offs.
I may not be able to turn water into wine but I can turn orange juice into mimosas.
If at first you don't succeed, wine, wine again.
Cool it with the organic wines, Trader Joe's. The only sustainability I care about when I drink is my buzz.
How do you guys not spill your wine on the treadmill? Wait, I'm not on a treadmill. OMG THE FLOOR IS MOVING!!!!
It's raining in LA. Who's gonna deliver me motivation and wine? Okay, fine, just the wine.
In case you think I don't understand loss, I'm out of wine.
The Vatican made all of @Pontifex's tweets disappear. I can do the same with wine.
It's important to let wine open up. That's why I drink mine out of a Big Gulp.
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